Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
