Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize