just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.