I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
