It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
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drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
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You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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