the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
