I think im going to throw up on grandma
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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