Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
