her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
