Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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