eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
3pm strippers are depressing
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Randomize
