I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
