If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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