I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
