New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize