i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize