If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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