yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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