Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize
