Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
We are two peas in an std pod
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
