never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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