wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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