How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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