He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
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Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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