Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
