Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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