I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
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I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
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