Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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