yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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