I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I see more hoeing in ur future
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
