Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Randomize
