The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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