omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize