11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
