you traded sex for a burrito?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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