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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial

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• (713): View more from Texas

  I looked at my own cervix.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.

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• (805): View more from California

  100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people

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• (801): View more from Utah

  sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.

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