what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
