Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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