I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
