where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize