Please don't use social media to get back at me.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
