Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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