woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
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