I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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