cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
