About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
