How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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