East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
