You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
