Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
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